Question why you did that
Text your best friends that you got home safe because they were the only ones you told before embarking on your journey
Take picture of said muffler
Laugh at said picture of muffler (I don’t mean to brag but I go through the five stages of grief quickly)
Call your mom to tell her every single detail of what happened. Be sure to include your best foley artist noises of the sound emanating from the dark underbelly of your car. When typed phonetically, it looks a little something like this: grrrrrnnehhhhggg. Got that, mom?
Talk her down off the ledge of worry. Hang up midst her saying, “I love you.” Whoops.
Rip off all your clothes
Come inside your apartment
Number 6 and 7 should be reordered
Make yourself a lavender epsom salt foot bath
Just sit with yourself for awhile. (Picture me sitting upright on the couch with both hands placed on my lap, feet in foot bath, and eyes staring forward, at nothing.)
Text your dad the bare minimum level of details—just enough so that he stays abreast of the situation and can provide advice but not too much that he feels the need to call you.
Put your phone on sound even though your phone is never on sound.
Wait for Dad’s reply.
Forego the foot bath and stand in the shower with your arms over your head because you’ve seen runners do that and it feels right after the marathon it feels like you just ran
Get the reply and quietly accept that no matter how old you are and how far away you live from your dad, you still have to follow his directions. How does your dad know about the Imperious Curse?
Ponder how you’ll ever be able to have a family if a 12 hour work day and a broken car pushes you over into insanity
Ponder how anyone ever willingly decides to add another human into the mix as controlling one life that you didn’t ask for in the first place is hard enough
Look in the mirror and be surprised that your face hasn’t been horrifically disfigured from the stress
Realize that there are so many people dealing with vastly more difficult issues
Question how any human ever really keeps it together and gets through life in one piece
Accept that maybe none of us get through in one piece
Wonder which of your pieces won’t be making the cut.*
*My muffler isn’t making the cut.